The name’s Atric…Gerry Atric
When I was young and immortal, I presumed this bod would hold up from cradle to grave. However, our health scale teeters in a precarious balancing act. Often, the decades…
Acronyms Anonymous
1. ACNP ⭐ Adult Children (of) Normal Parents - As a rule, attendance at the yearly AGM is predictably very low. 2. DHR ⭐ Double Hip Replacement - Talking to…
New Year ~ Same Hot Mess
Who has a dramatic flair for entering a room? 2022, that’s fucking who! Glacial temperatures colder than my mother-in-law’s kiss. Trains, planes, and automobile travel gone off the rails. The…
We Wish You A Merry Crisis and a Happy New Fear!
Shakespeare said a rose by any other name would smell as sweet. 2021 (2020’s ugly step-sister) looked like a dandelion and smelled like weed. As we bid adieu to yet…
Things You’re Technically Allowed To Do, But, Should You…?
✴ Polish off the shrapnel inside your bra after binging a family size bag of chips. ✴ Inform your wife she sounds like her mother. ✴ Park your sparkly new…
20 Things A Guy Would Never Say
1. I’ve got my father’s thighs. 2. She looks like the marrying kind. 3. People see me as handsome, but I’m so much more than that. 4. Do these jeans…
What If Prudence Programmed Our Playlists?
Shake that ass for me, shake that ass for me… We’re card carrying members of the Eminem fan club, something the real Slim Shady couldn't foresee. His demographic is all…
The Zoom Boom
By now, most of us have jumped on the Zoom train, the interwebs newest party in a box. When basic human connection vanished without a trace, the Hollywood Squares version…
