Fraternal Doers and Dreamers
At the exact moment I was born, the universe was at its maximum capacity for hyper-efficient women. One of the few traits still available was idler, and lucky enough, it…
Three-Tier Cleaning For Friends
When friends drop by, at any given moment, what state would your house be in? I confess to various levels of effort and anxiety when hosting company. From a ten…
She’s Still Got Great Mileage
Following a rare, good night's sleep you awaken feeling young and nubile. Overnight, your sexagenarian odometer clicked backwards, thus reversing your internal mileage. Click click. You nail the right shade…
How To Be a Good Partner
HER: 🍑 Don’t have 700 throw pillows on your bed. 🍑 Surrender 1/16 of the bathroom space for his toiletries. 🍑 Concede that his method of loading the dishwasher is…
Surviving Ovarian Retirement
Shortly before my 49th birthday, internal alarm bells set off a menacing chime. “Why is she so snarky?” my pursed lips asked my clenched jaw. “Why is she so snacky?”…
Time For Another Edition of “What The Hell Is Happening To My Body!”
Welcome to 55+, known to us crusty cool cats as the corn husk years. The era where your body demands attention, akin to a cactus with a flair for the…
Partners In Grime
By virtue of our vag, women are born into a life of servitude. Clean the latrine Cinderella. Febreze ‘til you wheeze Cinderella. This suzy homemaker is officially lowering the bar.…
The Twelve Wines of Christmas 🍷
On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, A headache from the Chablis On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, Two…
Elf On A Shelf – Police Blotter
Another sad story of a famous child gnome, whose top-billing went straight to his dome. His youth spent in a supporting role at the pole, eventually took a toll on…
