Training Your Pelvic Floor Puppy
For over half a decade I’ve been discovering cockamamie new things about my body. In countless conversations with girlfriends, the song is one and the same. Our catalogue of health…
The Amazing Race: Mother’s Day Ovary Edition
To fully appreciate the dramatic effort it takes for one egg to get fertilized, you must recognize the miracle of the female body. In honour of Mother’s Day, let’s delve…
I’m Not Gonna Sugarcoat It
After spending the better part of our lives together, refined sugar and I ended our relationship. It wasn’t a mutual decision, divorce rarely is. A sucker for sucrose, I was…
I’m Having an Auto-body Experience
This isn’t another new year, new me post…but it kinda is. Every January, I resolve to sober up, tighten the purse strings, and lose the gunt. But by week three,…
The name’s Atric…Gerry Atric
When I was young and immortal, I presumed this bod would hold up from cradle to grave. However, our health scale teeters in a precarious balancing act. Often, the decades…
Chugga Chugga Toot Toot
When we were young, Mom preferred to use the word “spark” in lieu of fart, as potty humour was reserved for stinky boys. “Eew, you sparked!” would have us rolling…
Surviving Ovarian Retirement
Shortly before my 49th birthday, internal alarm bells set off a menacing chime. “Why is she so snarky?” my pursed lips asked my clenched jaw. “Why is she so snacky?”…
Time For Another Edition of “What The Hell Is Happening To My Body!”
Welcome to 55+, known to us crusty cool cats as the corn husk years. The era where your body demands attention, akin to a cactus with a flair for the…
If Men Had A Uterus
1. Going forward, Aunt Flo's visits will be man-dated to 3-5 business days, open on weekends. 2. Masculine hygiene commercials would depict a hockey slash/gash crime scene with blood flowing…
