Chugga Chugga Toot Toot
When we were young, Mom preferred to use the word “spark” in lieu of fart, as potty humour was reserved for stinky boys. “Eew, you sparked!” would have us rolling…
The Liabilities of Being a Lefty
For thousands of years, left-handers were branded with a scarlet letter L. Deemed weak, luciferian, and mercilessly persecuted, while the almighty right-handers ruled the roost. By the 1960’s, corporal punishment…
How To Be a Good Partner
HER: 🍑 Don’t have 700 throw pillows on your bed. 🍑 Surrender 1/16 of the bathroom space for his toiletries. 🍑 Concede that his method of loading the dishwasher is…
Things That Make You Feel Young
1️⃣ Driving your kid’s stick shift with the windows rolled down 2️⃣ A high pony swishing back and forth across your shoulders 3️⃣ Letting your partner feel you up during…
Surviving Ovarian Retirement
Shortly before my 49th birthday, internal alarm bells set off a menacing chime. “Why is she so snarky?” my pursed lips asked my clenched jaw. “Why is she so snacky?”…
Time For Another Edition of “What The Hell Is Happening To My Body!”
Welcome to 55+, known to us crusty cool cats as the corn husk years. The era where your body demands attention, akin to a cactus with a flair for the…
Partners In Grime
By virtue of our vag, women are born into a life of servitude. Clean the latrine Cinderella. Febreze ‘til you wheeze Cinderella. This suzy homemaker is officially lowering the bar.…
When It Rains It F✶✶king Pours
What happens to your body when life tries to eat you alive, one chunk at a time? When your inner stress regulator (aka, the nervous system) is set to high…
How Much Time Is Spent…
If you’ve ever had an existential crisis, wondering what you’ve done with your life, consider this. We spend a whopping 2 ½ decades sleeping; not to mention an additional 7…
