Why I’ll Never Have A Rock-Hard Body
1. I save my carbs for wine. It’s called priorities After complaining to a friend about my dimpled arms, he grabbed a handful of loose skin and said, “Here’s the…
Con’GRAD’ulations To My Firstborn
Original Post May 2015 Moments after we finally met, I whispered “I hope I don’t forget to feed you.” An image of my goldfish floating upside down briefly swam to…
Recipe for a Mother
Take one woman in the prime of her life. Add a dash of sperm. Fold in nausea and uncontrollable food cravings. Sprinkle in stretch marks, tender breasts, and swollen ankles.…
Depression Is Like Snow
Whenever a rip-roaring spring snow storm unhinges my mental health, I'm reminded of this hauntingly beautiful description of depression. We're rolling out the red carpet for Mental Health Week May…
Note To My 20-Year-Old Self
1. Back pain is a direct result of youth leaving your body. 2. Trimming your nose hair is an actual thing. 3. Rock 'n roll all night and party every…
Globetrotting Girls
Do I have to pay extra for my emotional baggage? I regularly get felt-up and patted-down at airport security. No dinner or drinks, just a nod and a grunt. Makes…
The Evolution of Sex
I lost my virginity, but I still have the box it came in! Chapter I: We have the right tools for the job, but no idea how to use them.…
Frequently Asked Questions
Mom used to make cookies with me, Now she blogs and I pretty much raise myself. — Brennan, Abby, & Nolan It's hard to believe five years have passed since…
My Tiger Beat Heartthrobs
I think I'm in love! No wait, I was just hungry... There's a line from a Garth Brooks song that says “Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers.” Without that…
