HER:
Don’t have 700 throw pillows on your bed.
Surrender 1/16 of the bathroom space for his toiletries.
Concede that his method of loading the dishwasher is a-okay.
Until he can decipher the code between light, moderate, bleeding out, and wings, avoid asking him to buy feminine products.
Save your daily play-by-play commentary until there’s a break in the game, unless you want him gabbing throughout “The Bachelor.”
Ensure you have full eye contact before starting a conversation (a lil slap upside the head should do it).
Men prefer to unitask, with the exception of pooping and scrolling.
HIM:
Wash your own skid marks.
Refrain from the mansplain.
Despite feminist ideals, you can still open the door for her.
Avoid therapy by asking if she wants it fixed, or simply needs an ear.
Play with her hair, scratch her back, or give a massage with no sexual expectations.
Read the room to measure her barometric hormone pressure before engaging.
Be complimentary of a new haircut, fresh nails, or an outfit that makes her feel bodacious.
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