As Mom’s age progresses and her dependency increases, there’s a tightrope to walk. No one likes being told what to do, not when you’re six, and definitely not when you’re eighty-six, but eventually the dynamic has to shift. Our family matriarch hasn’t been dethroned, she’s just (re)tired. Still wearing the crown, but she’s happily abdicated the throne for a harvest gold recliner.
After a lifetime spoiled for choice, Mom now finds herself in the confines of a retirement home bubble. The Manor controls her room temperature and meal schedule, while a rotating cast of characters form her new social circle. Round that out with two well-meaning, semi-bullish daughters, all up in her bid’ness.
Since the changing of the guard, our roles have done a full 180. I’m now the bad cop, and she’s the rebellious teen. The more I mother her, the more she complains, rolls her eyes, and shit-talks me to her friends. All that’s missing is a bottle of contraband rosé clinking in her handbag as she sneaks off to a party.
When I pictured this chapter, I assumed it’d be more about tech support for the holy trinity: TV, iPad, and phone. Practicality overshadowed my tenderness when tracking missing wallets, lost keys, and compromised credit cards. I didn’t consider how hard this would be on the heart.
Turns out, my snippy impatience isn’t about the acts of service. It’s grieving the way things used to be. Back when HRH Shiela had full autonomy of her castle. However, she’s still here, just ruling from a smaller kingdom with a shared dining plan.
When it’s my turn to check into the Blue-Hair Hilton, I’ll have earned an honorary degree in senior care. Abby and I will have our own Freaky Friday role reversal. She’ll pop by to push me around (physically and emotionally), and I’ll do my best not to flip her off behind her back.
I’m learning to soften my heart and stop bracing for impact. To find the funny in our new normal. That, my friends, is the full circle of life. Slightly wrinkled, occasionally stubborn, but full of laughter and love! ❤️
So true. It’s a tough stage …. but if we don’t laugh we’ll cry. ❤️
Getting up close and personal with the seniors home circuit makes me more determined to enter that stage with my besties!
Haha, Party on Sheilds ❤️
She’s a feisty one with a great sense of humour!