Spilling The Tea On Lori: A (Mostly) Honest Introduction

✶ Relentlessly redefining confidence

✶ On the road to a black belt in karate, my meniscus tapped out at brown.

✶ Husbandless…by tragedy, then choice

✶ Game for whatever (don’t put this one right after husbandless)

✶ A former sweet tart, gut health is my new passion

✶ My nickname is Lorslayer, compliments of my nephews

✶ No time for emotions, unless they’re happy. I like my water like I like my feelings, bottled.

✶ The Goldilocks of personality, I’m not too deep or too shallow

✶ Like 7 out of 5 people, Lori is math illiterate

✶ Rubber face capable of contorting into Jim Carrey worthy animated expressions

✶ My drives off the tee box are money, unless someone’s watching

✶ Has a ssslight ssspeech impediment

✶ I’ve had the same four core friends my whole life.

✶ Lifestyle 180, from basic burbs to sexless in the (inner) city

✶ Call me multi-fashioneted – I’m up for a dress and heels, or sweatpants and slippers

✶ Being a visual person, my life plays out in a series of mini motion pictures

✶ I have Bryan Adams acerbic wit that cuts like a knife

✶ Competed on the Saskatchewan synchronized swim team at the 1983 Canadian games.

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