Entertainment

Pretty In Ink

Your body is a temple, but how long can you
live in the same house before you redecorate?

When I got my tattoo, I went to the shop with a clear image of where it was going, the size it would be, and the colours to be used. I even brought my favorite shoe along to show the artist how to frame her work. She had the bedside manner of a pit bull. She barked at me “The tattoo will still be there in 10 years, but the fucking shoes won’t.” I peed like a puppy in the corner and vowed she wouldn’t hear me whimper while she worked.

Old school ink was worn as a badge symbolizing rebels, outsiders, and hell raisers. The times, they are a-changing. The new generation of tattoo bearers have traded in the Harley for a Hyundai. Receptionists, yoga teachers, and suburban Mom’s are taking over the market previously reserved for bad-ass bikers.

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Body placement of a tattoo is critical as you age. As gravity takes over and parts slide south, sagging can distort the original image. Tattoos buckle on cottage cheese thighs, and tats on the tummy become humiliating 500% faster than any other body part. Regardless of what the name insinuates, tramp stamps don’t mean you’re a whore. Girls with bum bulls-eyes have high standards, and at least a two-drink minimum.

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My body is my journal and my tattoos are my story.  Johnny Depp

Tattoos are extremely personal, and often have significant meaning. It’s likely that dolphin or butterfly from your teen’s or 20’s doesn’t represent who you are today. What were you inking?  Body art when you’re younger is a permanent reminder of a temporary feeling. Think before you ink

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The first tattoo is a gateway drug. It’s easy to get hooked, and like potato chips, one is never enough. When considering a new tattoo, imagine revealing it to future grandkids and choose a spot that won’t gross them out. Between the tat and my reigning flip cup title, the next generation is bound to think I’m a pretty cool Glamma.

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Tattoo removal can be done with laser, but it’s costly and painful. Impulse tattoos and tequila driven decisions aren’t nearly as funny the next morning. Inscribing the name of your partner in permanent ink is as risky as walking under a ladder carrying a black cat on Friday the 13th. Avoid tattoo parlors that remain open 24 hours a day.

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Good tattoos aren’t cheap and cheap tattoos aren’t good.

Getting inked is not for the faint of heart. Needles pierce your skin between 50 and 3000 times per minute. The pain is nothing compared to our recent loss, so I’m making plans for a new tattoo. It will likely be a tribute to my Dad. I’ll be going back to the pit bull, because her reputation precedes her personality. After all, life’s too short to live with ‘regerts’...

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Sangria Wine Rack

To see,
or not to see

AnkleLower backWristShoulderBack of neck
Ohh…
what is it?

Asian characterCrossStarsFlowersButterflies
MotiveLoveLossReligionPrison/GangsHeritage
OMFG, OuchUnderarmUpper ribInner elbowGroinBack of knee
OopsToo smallOde to a loverImpulsiveDrunkCheap

Recommended tunes you should have on your iPod:
Billy Idol ✤ Rebel Yell
Hunter Hayes ❋ Tattoo
Pistol Annies ✪ Hell On Heels

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  1. Ken MacLean

    I am in for another round of tattoo’s too.

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