Health

Mid-Wife Crisis

When a women asks you to guess her age,
it’s like deciding whether to cut the red,
blue, or green wire to diffuse the bomb.

Me: I worked at one firm for twenty years. It was a great job, only I’m allergic to algebra. Moving on was always at the back of my mind, but that involved risk, fear of the unknown, and change. I detest change.

Her: I thrive on change. In order for me to stay at a job for any length of time, there needs to be a circus level variety in my day. I fear being stuck more than starting over.

Me: I’ve been a stay-at-home mom for over ten years. The other wino’s…er, sorry…mothers and I happily immersed ourselves in our kid’s lives. This role gave me a sense of achievement and purpose, and then the little buggers grew up.

Her: Working in an all-female environment for years validates I’m a team player, but increased my nightly wine intake considerably. After I “retired,” liquid lunches with girlfriends filled my afternoons. Eventually questions like “What did you do today?” became hard to answer.

Me: I diagnosed myself with the blues when pajama days became routine. My wine colored robe is actually green. I know firsthand that Sisters who are feeling down don’t need therapy. They need a reason to get out of bed every morning.

self-portrait

People are always asking what motivated us to start a blog. Creative narcissism. We weren’t online readers, had never followed other blogs, and have no formal training. However, we swear by the power of a sisterhood, so it seemed like the perfect fit. Our chutzpah sprung from the burning desire to reinvent ourselves. We earn fuck all, but we’re having a hoot. Those closest to us welcome another outlet for our pent-up sarcasm.

A milestone birthday, menopause, or empty nesting can trigger the question “Is this it?” We presume we’d have our shit together by now, or wish we’d done more with ourselves. Boredom, anxiety, and no sense of purpose are classic signs of midlife soul searching. Before you run off with the pool boy in search of a new life, keep an eye out for alternatives. When opportunity knocks, be ready to answer the door.

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Women deal with midlife much differently than men. We’re not prowling for hot cars, or shiny new dicks. We crave personal growth, and fewer wrinkles. The most profound difference between men and women is that women are twice as likely to be hopeful about the future. We are more willing to take risks and are less concerned with pleasing others. If you don’t like the direction I’m going, get the fuck off the bus.

Crossroads can be challenging, or they can afford you the freedom to rekindle or pursue new passions. A time to discover what interests you after years of caring for others. We have no guarantee that the Sangria Sisters Blog will succeed, or for that matter survive. We took a leap of faith, and for that we are grateful. It’s exhilarating and scary as hell, but for now, we’re blissfully writing our next chapter.

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Sangria Wine Rack

Ask yourself
What are your passions?
Identify your interests.
Write down the pros and cons.
Look for things that inspire you.
Take stock of your strengths and weaknesses.
Think long-term. Where do you want to be in 10 years?

Personal
Set goals.
Ignore your age.
Embrace change.
Broaden your horizons.
Gather your self-confidence.
Look for ways to reinvigorate your life.
Self-development is key to feeling fulfilled.

What now
Network.
Generate options.
Challenge yourself.
Don’t settle for something you can’t stand.
Enlist your friends. Strength comes in numbers.
When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
Make a choice to take a chance, or your life will never change.

Possibilities
Work on and deepen your relationships.
Research midlife career changes or entering the workforce.
Take a course, or if you’re feeling ambitious, go back to school.
Become a foodie. Rate and record your dining experiences.
Volunteer for a charity or nonprofit. Good causes can always use a helping hand.
Feeling frumpy? Get your makeup professionally applied to find colors that compliment you.
If you have leftover love to share after the kids leave home, consider rescuing a pet.
Design your own tattoo, even if you’re not the kind of girl who gets inked.
Take music lessons or learn a new language.
Start a walking group with your friends.
Find creative outlets for your interests.
Cooking, decorating, crafts, entertaining, yoga, fitness, music, reading, art, travel, gardening, sewing.

Don’t
Don’t worry so much about your health. Stress can be the root of your ailments.
Overcommitted and overwhelmed? Learn to say no.
Don’t be afraid to try something new.

Recommended tunes you should have on your iPod:
Stevie Nicks ✤ Landslide
Rod Stewart ✦ Forever Young
Miranda Lambert ✸ Gravity Is A Bitch

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Check out this week’s Sister Shout Out ~ Professional artist Melanie Morstad

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