Health

Caution: Memory Loss Ahead

They say your memory is the first thing to… something, something.

I suffer from CRS — Can’t Remember Shit. Everyday conversation is turning into a game of charades. “Oh, what’s the word…it’s on the tip of my tongue… I know it’s wrong but it feels so ripe…oh, you’ve guac to be kidding me.” My friends shout AVOCADO, and we high five like superstars. Sound familiar?

My brain is going to pot. I hide my shit in a safe place then forget where it’s stashed. I walk into rooms with a purpose, then zone out why I’m there. The biggest lie I tell myself is, you don’t need to write that down. My mind is crackerjack in the dark of night, and cotton candy by morning. Memory foam, my ass.

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The cruel truth is, our brain starts to sag around our mid-20’s, then loses a tenth of a second of brain speed per decade. We’re Mom’s, multi-taskers, and live in a pop culture world. With the internet at our fingertips, too much information is as dangerous as the Bermuda Triangle. Clutter goes in and it’s never found again.

Blanking out during a conversation is awkward. It forces us to use the word ‘thingy’ a little too often. If your train of thought has left the station with no passengers on board, take comfort you’re not alone. So stop fretting about losing your marbles, just forget about it…

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Sangria Wine Rack

BrainpowerBrainstorm
Aerobic exercise that increases blood supply to the brainYou don’t have to be Jane Fonda. Take a walk on the wild side 3 times a week.
Vitamins C, E, B6, B12, Gingko, and FolateOne does not simply eat the suggested servings of Flintstone Gummies.
Lifelong learning Follow your heart but take your brain with you.
A balanced dietEat your burger with lettuce and tomatoes.
Socialize regularlyI’d socialize more often, but it gets in the way of being home and doing what I want.
Get organizedShit’s easier to find when you know where you put it.
Sleep wellGet yourself some good meds.

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  1. Ken

    I don’t remember subscribing to this blog but it’s smart and funny.

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